Initially, the idea of combining money and marriage seems “disastrous.” Money, after all, is one of the top causes of conflict between married couples. It is also the second leading cause of divorce, just a step behind infidelity. Any conversation about finances in any kind of relationship is bound to encounter tension and frustration along the way.

Instead of arguing on whether you should get a joint account or invest in acondominium for sale, pause and think. Keep in mind: both of you come from different life experiences, especially in terms of views on finances.

So instead of giving each other grief, give each other grace and keep the following steps in mind to build bridges.

Set Your Financial Goals Together

Couples should always talk about their financial goals. Since each spouse has a different view in mind, it’s best to put them down and discuss them together. Identify what you want to achieve together and come up with a game plan to get there.

Some considerations you may want to discuss with your spouse:

• Ways to pay off debt accumulated together or separately
• How to budget daily household expenses
• Splitting off bills and living expenses
• Investment and saving strategies

Find a Financial Strategy that Works

No cookie-cutter strategy works for all couples. Decide on a money management strategy based on the goals you set. Consider the following money strategies:

• Combine your finances completely. A joint account is ideal for couples who have the same spending habits. Use your combined income to build a singular savings account and pay for all of your utilities and bills.
• Keep your finances separate. If the couple prefers to maintain financial autonomy, this strategy is ideal. Keep your money in separate bank accounts and split shared expenses based on the percentage of your income or equally.
• Live off one income. If one partner makes more than the other, living off one income is another option. The primary income earner can pay for all of their expenses. He or she can keep a separate account and transfer to their partner’s account for personal expenses, household expenses or both.
• Manage finances both separately and jointly. This can work for couples with the same debts and income. Share most of the household expenses and maintain separate incomes. Open individual bank accounts for personal expenses and joint accounts for shared expenses.

Separate the Need from the Want

Sit with your spouse and identify your needs and wants as a couple. Make sure you both agree on what you can or can’t live without. Similar to any aspect of relationships, compromise is essential. If one spouse disagrees with an idea, talk about the how’s and why’s so you can reach a middle ground.

While needs matter, you should give yourselves a break. Allot a budget for your wants, such as travel, shopping and date nights. When setting a budget for your wants, however, refrain from going overboard. If you want to buy antique décor for your home, check it against the budget first before making a purchase.

Establish an Emergency Fund

Secure your future by building an emergency fund for unprecedented events such as your car breaking down, emergency hospital visits or loss of jobs. Financial experts recommend saving up to three to six months’ worth of living expenses.

Apart from household expenses, consider loans and other debts that you are paying for when establishing the amount needed. Also, make sure you both have easy access to the emergency fund.

Stress and tension arise when spouses try to control each other’s spending decisions. Instead of arguing over the money, work as a team. Your spouse isn’t an enemy; they are your partner. You may still encounter a few hurdles along the way but when it comes to finances, always build each other up.